My husband is so excited to get his new iPhone6 in a few weeks. For Valentine’s Day, I got him the armband accessory for his upcoming new gadget. As we get used to our new marriage, I see this as a symbol of what it means to negotiate.
My husband used to love getting the newest items immediately after they came out. This year, I convinced him to wait a few months until his contract was up for renewal with our cell phone provider so that he would get a deep discount on the phone. We discussed it a few times and he slowly agreed.
By buying him the accessory, my intention is to show him how excited for him I am and how appreciative that he agreed to wait.
As I could have guessed, marriage is very much a give and take. In my previous relationships, I saw this too, but being married sets a much more serious and committed tone to the discussion. In the past, I always knew there was a way out, but here there isn’t.
Pressure can result from knowing that we will need to find an agreement somehow.
What I have found is that communicating clearly is so important. For us both, we now need to consider each other, as well as our future family, while before we didn’t need to consider much more than ourselves.
Fortunately, I feel like I chose someone with whom I am comfortable discussing issues. For me, this was the most important “quality” of someone that I was looking to marry. And best of all, I like gadgets too.